The term “wife-guy” came up recently on the internet, and it made me think of my ex-husband. He probably is still what the internet refers to as a “wife guy.
” He presents that as his front, but in reality, he was my covert narcissist husband. You can verify this by looking at the definition of “wife guy” on Wikipedia; “.
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. A wife guy is a man who is famous on social media because of the content he posts about his wife.
The term has become more broadly used to describe men who use their wives to raise their social status or public image. You wouldn’t think that a man with that kind of wife would be a covert narcissist or even a narcissist at all.
Yes, my ex managed to fool everyone, including me.
Throughout our relationship, he posted pictures of us smiling on social media while he abused, manipulated, and used me.
A photo of ours once went viral; I was dressed in clothes that were too small for me, and my husband was dressed business casually, and he was on his knees tying my shoes. It was a stunning image of a handsome coupe, and people all over the internet gave it a lot of mmmms and awwwws.
I read the comments with mixed feelings because I had begun to see the cracks in our facade since we had just got married. I’ll tell you how that picture came to be.
He took my leg, placed it on his lap, and loosened my shoelaces before we got out of the car while he was driving us from our hotel to his brother’s birthday party.
He replied, “Go with the flow, you’ll soon understand,” when I inquired as to why.
I finally understood. He was there to save the day when my shoe strings completely came undone while I was mingling at the party.
He made a big deal out of tying my shoes by bending down in his designer clothes. A picture was taken, and it ended up on my ex’s social media accounts.
He got the attention and praise he wanted, which was more than he expected and made him happy.
This marked the beginning of a period in my marriage where perfection was shown to the world while I did everything I could to live up to the lie.
It’s interesting that I saw my covert narcissist husband more and more as he shared our “happiness” online. The contrast was painfully sharp.
He would occasionally enter the kitchen, don an apron, and pretend to help in order to take a picture of himself while I was cooking. He would take a picture of the meal when it was ready to show before and after photos.
A sentimental caption such as “I helped make this” might be appropriate.
It looks and tastes just as good.
Delish! ”
Yet in reality, while he was eating, he would criticize the meal from head to toe. He would occasionally post me with the caption, “Isn’t she the most beautiful?
” Yet in reality, I would be told that my skin was becoming too dark, that I had gained weight, and that I was becoming unattractive.
While our marriage appeared perfect online, inside I was trapped, lost, and enraged.
And let’s be clear: it didn’t stop with social media.
He also presented a false front in front of friends and family. He was the sweetest person ever when my mother and sister were around; He cleaned, took over the kitchen, and we had a good time out there.
The story doesn’t end here — it continues on the next page.
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